Although the process “hasn’t always been rosy,” as Grant put it after the Flyers’ 84-70 victory over LaSalle on Tuesday afternoon at UD Arena, Alexander said through it all he’s becoming “a better version of myself.”
As a basketball player, the 6-foot, 23-year-old already has made quite a name for himself with his gritty play. He’s second in the nation among active college players, with 282 career steals.
Coming out of Our Saviour Lutheran High School in the Bronx, he became the Big East Freshman of the Year at St. John’s University and that season he also was the league’s co-Defensive Player of the Year.
After three seasons with the Red Storm, a coaching change prompted his departure for Butler, where last season he was 16th in the nation in steals.
After getting his undergrad degree, he said he wanted to spend his final (COVID extra) season of college ball at a place where he sensed “a family feel” and had a chance of finally playing in the NCAA Tournament.
He chose Dayton — which had recruited him out of high school — and he’s had some big games off the bench this season.
In a victory over then No. 2 UConn, the two-time defending national champions, he had 16 points, six assists, five rebounds and no turnovers.
Against Western Michigan he had 12 points and four steals and he tallied 11 points against both No. 12 North Carolina and No. 19 Cincinnati.
Off the court — when it comes to fatherhood — he’s still a rookie.
His son was born in July, two months after Alexander had become a transfer portal addition to the Flyers.
Aniyah and baby A’Miri lived with him just off campus during the past semester, but with the Christmas break, they moved back to her home in New Jersey .
After the UC game on Dec. 20, Alexander returned home to New York to spend Christmas and he introduced his family to his little boy.
After Saturday’s game he talked about spending time with his mom and dad, grandmother, nieces. nephews and others:
“It was good to be with all of them. I had a wonderful time. They hadn’t seen my son since he was born and some had never seen him.
“And it was great having an opportunity to open gifts with my son.”
He said he got him toys that make sounds and an iPad.
“The best gift was just holding him in my arms,” he said. “It’s a different feeling. A different love.
“When you have a tough day, when something didn’t go right, you can go home and hold your baby and you just feel blessed. That’s really brought a lot of joy to me and it’s making me want to attack each day better.”
‘I can see the bigger picture’
In his four previous seasons, his teams never got beyond the second round of the Big East Tournament and only last season’s Butler squad made the NIT, though the Bulldogs lost their opener to Minnesota.
He came to Dayton hoping to finally experience the NCAA Tournament and that may well happen.
The Flyers are 11-3 and have some impressive wins on their resume against then UConn and No. 6 Marquette and a victory over a gritty UNLV team that is far better than its 8-5 record.
There have also been strong showings in close losses to North Carolina and No. 5 Iowa State and a comeback of note against the physical Cincinnati Bearcats.
Tuesday, in the first of 18 Atlantic 10 Conference games, the Flyers started slow but took command in the final five minutes of the first half.
Guard Malachi Smith led the way with 20 points, six assists, five rebounds and two steals.
Fellow starters Nate Santos and Javon Bennett had 12 points, as did 7-foot-1 freshman Amaël L’Etang, who also added five rebounds and five assists coming off the bench. And Enoch Cheeks had 10 points and five steals.
Credit: David Jablonski
Alexander played just under 15 minutes and had three steals, three rebounds and two points.
“I feel like I played OK, but I didn’t play my best,” he said as he stood outside the locker room afterward. “I know there will be better days ahead.
“I can see the bigger picture, and this will motivate me to do better the next game.”
As he spoke, he held his cellphone where the screen display photo was a shot of his young son.
When he and Aniyah learned they were having a child, he said he didn’t panic, although the reality of it sometimes was a bit surreal:
“I’m sitting at a baby shower and then it hits me: it’s for my baby.
“And when I was in the delivery room, that was crazy. The biggest thing I worried about was (Aniyah) having a smooth delivery and our son being OK.”
He praised his girlfriend through all this:
“She’s sacrificed a lot and does so much for the baby. When they were here, if I had to get up early for practice or something, she got up a lot of the time at night.
“I give all the credit to her. She’s a great mother.”
He said he first met Aniyah when he committed to St. John’s out of high school. She’s a year older and already was a student there:
“I wanted to be with her already when I was in high school and when I first got to St. John’s, we’d talk. Finally I took her on a date and I liked everything about her. She just a wonderful lady.”
Lessons off the court
At UD, Alexander has had to adjust.
After starting the first game of the season, he’s come off the bench since and has been playing some nine to 10 minutes less a game than he did previously in his career,
As he’s learned a new role, he’s had to embrace a new mindset, as well.
“He’s a good guy, but he also needed to grow and mature,” Grant said. “There’s added responsibility on him now. There’s accountability. Being a dad is a new experience.
“We’ve tried to help him see some things differently and give him some of the ‘truths’ in terms of life and responsibility.
“Sometimes when you’re a good athlete, you get catered to and can get away with stuff. But there has to be consistency, where you see it’s no different for you than one of the other guys.
“We’re trying to give him something that maybe he hasn’t gotten before or been willing to receive before.
“There’s accountability. There’s realizing this is how it’s supposed to be done … and how it’s going to be done.”
Grant believes these lessons will pay dividends, not just in this season, but in the future:
“We may have somebody just eight, nine or 10 months now. You hope some of the lessons take. Once this is over, if you want to go on and make your living playing (pro) basketball, it can be unforgiving in that world.
“There will be a whole lot expected of you as far as what you have to bring to the table every day.
“We hope you learn how to deal with the unexpected things in your life. When things don’t go your way on the court or in personal relationships, you’ve got to do your best to stay true to your values.”
Alexander believes that will happen: “I do believe better days are ahead.”
He’s getting the family feel he sought at UD and there is a good chance at season’s end he will experience the NCAA Tournament.
And thanks to his son, in more ways than one, this is shaping up to be the most valuable and meaningful season of his career.
Credit: David Jablonski
Credit: David Jablonski
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